I am not a very religious person, but I do believe there is a higher power out there and people do pass on to some sort of spritual level weither it be heaven, earth or limbo. Our bodies are so full of energy that when we die, I imagine we have to go somewhere.
When my great-grandmother passed away when I was in junior high, she was the first real dead person I had ever seen up close. We had arrived at the hospice minutes later after she passed and I wasn’t that close to to her that it really didn’t bother me to see her like that. Two weeks later my great grandfather passed on. Luckily for me I was not there to see it in person. For about two years, my grandmother kept both of her parents ashes in urns in her bedroom until we were able to plan arrangements to scatter their ashes. For those two years, I refused to pass through her bedroom. Something about those ashes creeped me out.
Finally we were able to take a trip to our family vacation spot in Kern County to scatter their ashes in the river. We had a beautiful family cermony at night were my mother and uncle walked hand in hand into the river to scatter the ashes of their grandparents. The funny part was when my mother came down to the river the next morning, there was a huge white streak at the bottom of the clear river. Her mouth dropped and ran to get my stepfather to help her wade into the river and kick up the ashes from the river bottom before anyone else could see them.
About two weeks ago I was fast sleep in my bedroom and I woke up at 2:00 am on the dot to the smell of cigarete smoke. I am not a smoker myself, neither is my boyfriend and I don’t believe any of my near by neighbors are. The smell was so strong it woke me up so I knew I had to check it out. I checked around my apartment and peak outside to find nothing out of the ordinary. The smell started to disapate and baffled I went back to bed and fell asleep.
Yesterday morning I was leaving my apartment at 6:00 am and I turned to lock my front door when this overwelming smell hit it me. The smell was the exact same smell I remember my great grandmother smelling like. It wasn’t a perfume smell, but that unique smell that a person has naturally. I stopped and looked around. It was still early and no one was around. I locked my door and walked around the corner to my car. I could still smell her all the way to my car and the air held a thick heavy feeling similar to early morning fog, but living in Phoenix, there is rarely any fog. I got in my car and the smell started to make me worry. Why was I smelling her? Is she warning me about something? Should I drive to work? Will I get into an accident? What should I do? I started to text my mom, but I knew she would still be asleep and put my cell phone away. I took a deep breathe and drove on to work and the smell disapeared.
I called my mom when I got out to work later that day and told her about my experience and she simply said “grandma was visiting you.” It finally occurred to me my great grandmother used to smoke and I had a flash back of the night two weeks ago when I thought someone was in my bedroom smoking. Maybe it was her. I have been wondering for the last 24 hours why she would suddenly visit me. My mom said she was just checking me out to see how I was doing.
Maybe she is, maybe this is just my imagination. Who knows. Some people find it comforting to know love ones come and visit. Right now it doesn't scare me if I am visited by loved ones, we will all one day discover what is really beyond this life on earth.
